Hahahahahhahahahaha…..
Yes indeed. Scheduling.
The real BBEG for table toppers and parents alike! And as we all know, or if you don’t you can imagine, being in the center if the Venn Diagram is not an inch more fun than being on either side. I can’t tell you how many memes are on r/dndmemes (a beautiful specimen of internet) are dedicated to this topic. Conversely, generic mom humor sources on the subject are books from over-caffeinated boomer mothers complaining about having kids in general, and “oh by the way, getting them to soccer practice is impossible!!!!” Dads, I’m not sure what you get, honestly, but that in and of itself probably means it’s not great. So I thought, since we all feel this pain here, we might as well talk about it and try to make it funny.

So, if Scheduling is the BBEG, what’s the play? Please, please, please don’t try to jump into scheduling table tops with a baby with no plan, lol… because that’s what I did. And it worked the first time when he was maybe 2 months old; I put LGD in a baby sling and he napped on my chest for half the session, and then woke up to drink a bottle for the rest. But I was very naive to assume that I’d be able to time 5 friends coming over to the house with a newborn’s nap schedule every time. Like, typing that out loud AND having hind-sight makes my logic look very bad… nat 1.

An obvious solution which we use often is to get a babysitter. And I realize that now you have to schedule the friend’s meeting up AND a babysitter (DO NOT always assume your spouse who doesn’t play is up for it every time, that’s just bad graces). It is stressful, but so far from impossible. Grandma’s are great and wholesome and helpful, and they should be in more of our backstories.

But when Plan A does fail and Grandma has church obligations, you may want to try bringing your little dragon to the table with you as opposed to canceling your game. At that point, I think getting your party on your side is key. I’m blessed to have a great pod of hyenas that I play with, and they are totally fine with taking breaks when LGD needs them, for diapers, lullabies, or whatever. Once in a while a spouse who doesn’t play with us will take him in the other room, so he can hear his parents’ voices and be comforted but he doesn’t necessarily interrupt. Sometimes his separation anxiety gets to be too much, though. It so endearing when your child wants you and only you, but also so exhausting… like a NPC that the DM really didn’t want to keep voicing. So no, you’re not alone if you’re feeling tired and you just want to play your game. But remember, with these little dragons, it’s still a game. The rules just changed up a bit.

If all else fails, or if you just want to get ‘em started early, yes, bring them to the table!!! Maybe try packing some snacks/bottles beforehand (Brennan Lee Mulligan isn’t the only one who will throw a fit without food at the table) and have them in a cooler nearby. Have their favorite blanket ready, or a sling to snuggle them easily as you role play. Bring some soft, silent toys ready to play with (unless, IDK, a sound effect on baby’s first guitar is the sound effect your bard’s been looking for). And, do some arm stretches for sure: because if the baby can reach the table you will quickly realize how terrifyingly choke-able all dice and minis are. If you don’t want to use a sling or if you have a bad back, don’t feel bad, a high chair or playpen near the table still does the trick for us! Warn your players/DM beforehand that you will need breaks, and if they still aren’t accommodating… well, maybe problem players will be another post, this one is already a bit long…

Point ultimately being: Yes, you can absolutely do this starting at any age! THEY WILL HAVE FUN AND SO WILL YOU… just schedule a few extra breaks, and pack for success 🙂 you know, choose the adventurer’s kit!